my new job

started a new job yet again..
the thing that i hate the most about starting to work at new places; you are all a stranger to a group of people getting along quite well (since all of them share same enemy). starting days are all the same, you go to work, you try to do your work, sit quietly and smile when all others are chit chatting and you’ve even got better gossip and remarks than most of them but you just have to sigh and keep it to yourself; the reason, you are the new girl and don’t yet want to leave your shell and join them.

i don’t know if its the same with all of you but, to me the cycle repeats itself at every new place.

let’s see how long it takes to be the crazy self again.. 😐

the dialogues that i get in my starting days.

“why do you speak so low; we can’t hear you. (well, no comments about that. have been overheard by the very person of whom i am talking so many times that now even ppl don’t mind me and i am considered outspoken.. lol.)

“you speak so little” (i guess my friends would like to answer for me on this.)

and many such that i don’t even care remembering.

my only answer to all the above questions..

 

बार – बार मैंने आगे बढ़ ,
आज नहीं मांगी हाला,
समझ न लेना इससे मुझको,
साधारण पीनेवाला ,
हो तो लेने दो, ऐ साकी,
दूर प्रथम संकोचों को,
मेरे ही स्वर से फिर सारी,
गूँज उठेगी मधुशाला।

A regular blogger I am..

Every time  i write a post, i think that now onwards i am going to be regular. i want to write at least 5 posts a week.

and my past history shows exactly the opposite. sometimes i am just flowing with ideas to write and feel like a professional writer and and the other times are like, hmmm.. what should i write??

i have always loved literature, though mostly fiction. i don’t like going for biographies or travelogues or history. novels, stories, drama are all my cup of tea. at the start of every academic year, i would sit with Hindi and English textbooks and read up all the stories, neglecting the poems and essays.

i loved going into the imaginary world of the author and would even spend times pondering over possible other outcomes (mostly for the ones with tragic end) had the characters behaved or acted differently.

poems would also come to my thoughts after they were taught in the school and they were usually like if they had some very good rhyme or a great incident to narrate or simply if i just liked them..

as for my love for writing, the credit goes to the creative writing section of the curriculum. i loved that part and evaluated my writing based on the marks that i got.

here i end my chattering and again decide to write regularly.. 😛

Don’t you quit..

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit -
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a fellow turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Don't give up though the pace seems slow -
You may succeed with another blow.
Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man;

Often the struggler has given up
When he might have captured the victor's cup;
And he learned too late when the night came down,
How close he was to the golden crown.
Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint in the clouds of doubt,

And you never can tell how close you are,
It might be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit -
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

read this poem when i was looking for inspirational videos on YouTube..
And wrote this down from Psalm.org. it has few extra lines than those from YouTube.

that mysterious ruin..

i was a seven when my father was posted to Allahabad, a holy city known for the union of three rivers (Ganga, Yamuna and Saraswati). my school was at a distance of 20 km from where i lived ( being a choosy one and having studied in Army School till then, i preferred Army School rather than going to other nearby schools).  Another school, Kendriya Vidyalaya was at a walking distance from our school. both the schools had time difference of one hour in their schedule. our school started early. we lived in army area and a school bus was provided by army for the people living there. since the schools were distant from where we lived, there used to be just one army bus for both the school children. so we had one hour to spare after school and that, we spent doing everything imaginable. we would emulate the scenes seen in the superhero serials (of course the ones that were humanly possible), ate all kinds of foods that were available near school, did our homework (wow, but that was rare) and yes, the most fascinating part visited the ruins that were in a good number in the vicinity.

we used to find many things here like old fountain pens, boxing gloves and guards (well, there were many but these are the things that i distinctly remember and m not going to write etc. etc.). our driver uncle once along with all the children visited a castle-like ruin  (because we dared not to go there alone). it started with an empty hall like space with a spiral staircase at the dark end of this space. the spiral due to its construction was entirely dark and going upward clockwise (that again added to the dark element at that time rather than enlightening my brain with the fact that they were built particularly in that manner to avoid being seen and so that the defender (right-handed) can fight while moving down. the stairs and a few rooms were the only part of that ruin which i saw; as i was moving past one room, i imagined hearing something and ran down the stairs and sat in the bus all along. what others told me later (which consisted more of their imagination than reality): some of the stone slabs were missing to trick the enemy to fall down in a chamber that was full of crocodiles; driver uncle just missed one such gap; they even heard the crocodiles moving (as if they were rocking themselves to be heard by the group of children walking one storey above them.

it was one such visit to the ruin that made me really fear them. it was this stadium-like building that had a stage and long rows of bench. me and one other girl (she was in VIII standard) went there, jumped and echoed our voices and then finally when we were stepping out of the building, we saw our bus going away. we ran but it was too far for us to catch it.

i was so freaked out and crying was all that my grown-up mind could think of. the other girl suggested we go to the military hospital nearby where there would a bus for our area (thank god she was in VIII standard and knew these things). we went to the hospital and yeaa, a bus was there.

however, someone spotted us missing and our school bus came to the hospital searching for us and we reached home safely. but that was a dreadful hour that i had spent trying to figure out how to reach home.

and that was the end my expedition to the ruins and after that incident, i was always found near the bus.

DPchallenge

some offhand songss..

some of the songs that i just love for their don’t care lyrics and music that is different and theme that just opposes the normal flow of the things..

-> Dum Maro Dum from Hare Krishna Hare Rama; i love this song since the times when i didn’t even know the meaning of ‘Dum’.  this song shows a group of drug addicts vacillating and enjoying the drowsiness of their own world. the son  is all about not caring for the what the world says and doing whatever we think the best.

-> Sadda Haq from Rockstar; a song that opposes the the world for its hypocrisy and ask the people to claim whats theirs; claim the right to speak the truth; claim to do what IS right and not what is considered right; claim the right to follow one’s mind.

-> Khalbali from Rang De Basanti; a song where a group of friends are enjoying themselves along with a stir of mind that comes to them despite their carefree and reckless attitude when they start acting the roles of our freedom fighters.

-> Mera Rang De Basanti Chola from The Legend of Bhagat Singh; the song that Bhagat Singh, Rajguru and Sukhdev sing while they are being taken to be hung till death. even with death at their footsteps, they have no fear, no regrets, no pain. the line that i love th emost is ‘marke kais jeete hai, is duniya ko batalane, tere lal chale hai maiye ab teri laaj bachane..’.

->Bezubaan from ABCD; a scream from the heart who has suffered and lost his dreams to the reality of world.

i am no music expert to comment on the superb music quality or the crescendo or the bass. what i like about the above songs is the careless tone, the attitude and the call to fight for what you think right and go for it.

Gandhi – an era beyond time; an epic beyond words..

Gandhi – a man who lived a life following what he truly believed, no matter how hard it became; a man who has been idolized by many and is being followed by millions even today; a man who selflessly fought for others; a man to whom all were equal no matter what his/ her caste, creed or color; a man who was recognized and rewarded not just by his own people but his opponents also; a man who we call mahatma..

this post is not about Gandhiji or his principles or his life. much has been written about it and i don’t have anything new to add to that. this is about what i feel about the legend.

during college and even today, i meet many people who like to whine about how Gandhi was wrong because of his principles of non-violence or that truth in today’s world is not a solution or more strict actions should have been taken during partition. it is considered cool or trendy to be speaking something anti-Gandhian.

i myself am not a die-hard follower of Gandhi and like the “Bhagat Singh’s line of thinking” more. a little bit violence for a cause rather than non-violence (and it certainly does not mean that i carry a dagger in my pocket and a gun in my hand, slaying those who don’t agree (which, in some cases i really wish)). “बहरे कानो तक आवाज़ पहोंचाने के लिये धमाके की ज़रूरत पड़ती है।” – भगत सिंघ is what i believe more.

all i want to say is that’s our personal opinion and that gives us no damn right to condemn a person who has influenced so many people and who has lived a righteous life. at his call, millions of people gathered to join him in whatever movement he embarked. to join his movement, students left colleges and schools, people left jobs and their comforts (boycotting foreign goods) and even women left their daily chores. there must be something that made those people follow him even if they didn’t knew him personally. how many people would quit their work and normal life and join me or those who criticize Mahatma, if we come up with some idea of rebellion or started some movement that would get us arrested for sure.

all i want to say is that we are not adept enough to criticize or even comment about Gandhi. and if someone is really intent in doing so, then he must first raise himself to a level where his words become quotes and his call becomes command and his life becomes a national asset.

and yes, it takes much much more than courage to follow non-violence. to go on getting blows voluntarily when you know that you can fight needs really strong will and sheer strength of mind.

lastly, some of the quotes from this great man that i like:

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.

You must be the change you wish to see in the world.

Nobody can hurt me without my permission.

Even if you are a minority of one, the truth is the truth. (governments seem to be acting exact opposite)

An ounce of practice is worth more than tons of preaching. ( so true and so less practiced)

A small body of determined spirits fired by an unquenchable faith in their mission can alter the course of history. (a toast to all those who have their names written in history)

There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread.

Honest disagreement is often a good sign of progress.

Whatever you do may seem insignificant to you, but it is most important that you do it.  

Non-violence requires a double faith, faith in God and also faith in man.

What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans, and the homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty or democracy? (if only this thought is given a thought)

the best one, one that i would like to live: My life is my message.

quotes taken from http://www.brainyquote.com

thAt oLd mEssagE..

many of us may have received this message and read and enjoyed it; every time i read it, it gives a happy feeling.. 

Some of the best gifts in life:

Unconditional Love

Friends

New Life

Love

Some of the best moments in life:

feeling the first rain of the season

thinking about the person u love

your eyes are filled with tears after a big laugh

looking at old photos & smiling.

and DANCE – dancing like no one’s watching..

collages made using the collage making tool of http://www.fotor.com

live, dance, enjoy..

i am a gujarati and for a gujarati, any occasion or even no occasion means garba.. Recently , i went to marriage and there it was, the garba. generally, it starts with the traditional ones followed by fast ones, then one or two romantic numbers for the lovebirds and then the dance numbers.

recently, i was having these tremendously drastic mood swings and felt low and all that emotional crap. but the event just did the work. we danced and danced and danced. it was 3:30 in the morning when the dancing feet stopped and mind was like whoaa.. hurraayyy.. yaahooo..

DANCE, tune some music and just let yourself drift away with it. jump like crazy. forget the world. leap and feel being with the clouds. it really helps when we are emotionally low or we want to fight the world or when the going gets tough. it helps us burn some calories too (don’t like exercising, enjoy dancing).

so keep dancing and yelling..

P.S.: I am a terrible dancer and stomping someone’s feet or hitting a dandiya on your face is no ‘happens somtimes’ for me.

happy independence day..

Three things in my mind:

First, I was in Junagadh on 13^th, 14^th and 15^th August. Our chief minister Mr. Narendra Modi  was to arrive there for some inauguration purpose and flag hoisting on the Independence Day. And it was, well not surprising but pity to see the entirely changed picture of Junagadh. Roads built, no garbage- clean and green Junagadh, lightings decorating many govt. buildings and roads, all this accompanied by beautiful fireworks. In short Junagadh had become a city which one would start loving.

Second, there is no trace of rains and people are hit by somewhat partial, if not full-fledged draught. Prices are sky high and people are finding it hard to make both ends meet, fulfill the basic necessities, let alone luxuries.

Third, I am not an anti-Modi protagonist criticizing his every move. In fact, I am a big fan and follower of that person. But, was all this grandeur and pomp necessary?? The city is going to go its old way again, garbage accumulating, roads(too strong to survive a single rain) falling apart and all such things that we are generally used to.

The people of Junagadh got their city made beautiful for Independence Day. But was the expenditure worth it, the money, the manpower could have had some much better utilization.

Anyways, better something than nothing..

HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY

into the paulo coelho’s world..

I read his work ‘The Alchemist’ and my brain stopped working. Generally when I finish a book, my mind is flowing with thoughts and ideas and there are so many things that come and go. But at the end of his book; nope, nothing! The mind went blank, but yes the void contained some vague questions and revelations about life, about dreams, about magic and ultimately about god.

The book is about a young boy who starts a journey based on his dream and how his journey ends with his dream coming to reality and all the immense knowledge that he acquires a midst his journey; journey led by his dream.

Nothing too extraordinary to make your mind dumb but still it did. All credits to the way the story has been told. The dream, the wish to go after that dream, confusion regarding the decision whether to continue with the present life or chase what the heart cherishes the most, the ups and downs of the journey, things lost and things gained during the excursion, the magical omens that guide the boy at every instant, the ultimate light that bestows upon the boy or anyone who has has the guts to follow their dreams and of course about the doer of all things, The Almighty.

If I am to sum up all the above mentioned complex things; dream and then follow it; Do every thing that you have to, cross every hurdle and you would be helped; Ultimately you will live your dream and what else could be better!!
(: